I Review Everything: Day 131 – New Dungeons & Dragons 1

We left Effion’s castle ready for adventure. Ready to pummel the forces of evil and keep balance among the land. We left happy, good-hearted, and courageous.

Then we set a plain of dry grass on fire, lost one of our teammates to the fear of a horse, and destroyed an entire town because we were worried they were against us. Typical D&D.

It was the magic beans that caused the true problems. As soon as the dungeon master uttered the words, we just had to buy some. It didn’t matter what they did, we just had to have them.

It was then that I noticed the well. The towns only water supply, open for anyone to take. Or give. After seeing the effects of the bean on my teammate Reverend Rooseberry, I decided to grind one up and put it into the well. Just to see what would happen. What I didn’t notice was two townsfolk setting their gaze upon me doing so, and leaving quickly. Luckily for me Gwendolyn quickly took one down with a series of roguish maneuvers, dropping his body into the grate below. We lost the other one though. We had no idea what would come of him.

At this point we grew hungry, seeking a meal from the tavern. Disappointed at the poor quality of the food they had, Reverend Rooseberry told the tavern keep of his brilliant skill as a chef for Effion’s palace. Delighted to hear it, the tavern keep asked him to prepare a meal, using the ingredients they had. Rooseberry agreed, and the beginning of our plan was set.

While preparing the meal, we used water from the well to cook the vegetables, and various beans were planted through the pork. I also mashed more beans into a baste that we spread across the cooked pig. A delicious meal, for an unsuspecting town.

The tavern was completely full when we brought out the food, and there was enough for everyone. Within a few short moments the hall started eating. And we watched.

The large Kingpin-like mayor was the first to succumb. He was overly enthusiastic about the food, scarily so. His excitement consistently grew, until rage befell his eyes, and he grabbed the head of the patron beside him, crushing the poor skull between his fingers.

A large fight ensued, with blood splattering everywhere as the townsfolk destroyed their very friends, all because of us. We used this opportunity to escape and find our way back to the mayors office. Ready to collect our spoils.

The office wasn’t as dead as we had planned. A man was there, desperate to find the mayor. But it was too late. The mayor was probably gone by now. To make sure, Gwendolyn through a flaming vial of oil at the tavern, lighting the oil-covered tavern aflame. They were sure to be gone now.

The man at the office revealed himself, only to be caught by our monk. Rooseberry then tortured the man, demanding answers he didn’t have, to questions he couldn’t understand. That man died at our hands. It was too late to regret anything.

But regret was felt when we heard the thunder. Up the stairs of the mayors building, a large thundering could be heard. It was coming closer. Closer. It became too much to bear.

The door flew open with massive force. Standing behind, was a brain and guts covered man, thundering his way down the steps towards us. He escaped the tavern alive. Angrier than ever before, his massive body towered above us as we realised what we had done. We turned the mayor into a monster. A rage filled, gigantic monster.

Now we must fight.

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